Authentic

I recently read various articles regarding the previously unpublished diary excerpts of Mother Theresa. This woman who was very much the image of Christ to so many wrote: "I am told God loves me -- and yet the reality of darkness & coldness & emptiness is so great that nothing touches my soul." In one sitting, she described Jesus as "the Absent One" as she encountered such suffering.

Later, I read some commentary that seemed nearly gleeful in reporting on this and speculating on her spiritual life, or perceived lack thereof. Many were suggesting that Mother Theresa really, at the end, was not a believer. As if this might be the "Easter ossuary" or "un-empty Empty Tomb" that would finally rock Christianity. But it seems clear to me that these commentators are unfamiliar with the God we know or the set of books we call the Bible which chronicle bits of humanity's relationship with Him.

I've read and heard it said that the strongest statements of doubt about God in the midst of our troubles come from the Bible, itself.

Consider Habbakuk: "How long, O Lord, must I call for help, but you do not listen? Or cry out to you, 'Violence!' but you do not save." (1:2)

Consider David in Psalms: "O my God, I cry out by day but you do not answer, by night, and am not silent." (22:2)

Consider Job: "I cry out to you, God, but you do not answer; I stand up, but you merely look at me." (30:20)

These voices from the Bible express doubt. They express true feelings of anguish. They're not the polished, clean voices of the "religious." They're the real cries of real people aching and hurting and calling to God for help in their real lives. And their approach is honest: "God, where are you? What about your promises? What about your redemption for this world? Where is your justice?"

It seems we serve a God who wants us to approach Him honestly and authentically in this way. There are numerous passages in the Bible where God tells His people that He's far more concerned with the honesty of their hearts than he is with the outward trappings of their religion. Just read the first chapter of Isaiah, and read how God feels about inauthentic, heartless prayer and worship. He wants you; not the religious person you might pretend to be so that you can feel as if you're finally praying "right."

At The FOM, we talk often of being "authentic." We specifically talk about that in conjuncton with our relationships with one another in community. But more than that, it is vital that we each seek God authentically. That we do not pretend to be someone we are not when we pray to Him and seek Him. And that even when He feels distant in the trials of our lives, we follow the example of this woman who continued to serve and love others amidst her own doubts; as she followed the example of the One who dared to ask, "My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?" (Matthew 27:46)