What Happened to Me

I'm hoping this is a good way to tell this story. I think it will be helpful for me to "write it out."

Last week, around Wednesday, I received an email from the pastor of the church I previously attended. The title was "THAT WAS A GOOD EASTER," and it included a transcript of a story I shared with the church one Easter a few years back. It was the story that most of you have already heard about God rescuing me from death when I was 3 years old. That story has been vital to me for as long as I can remember. It's shaped how I understand God and my desire for intimacy with Him. I am convinced I would be a different person were it not for this story. It's my "road to Damascus," I suppose.

So I read through the email. And it occurred to me to share it with another friend of mine who is a pastor of a church. On Friday I was up at the office by myself. It was quiet. I forwarded the email to him, and he asked if he could read it to his congregation on Easter. I told him that the story didn't belong to me, and told him he could absolutely share it. This started a discussion that led to a bit of an epiphany for me. And I use the phrase, "a bit," because I'm always conscious of how strange it sounds when someone says, "I heard God's voice." But I did. Or at least I think I did.

I told my friend that, for my whole life, people have asked me what I believe God saved me for....what my purpose was....what great thing I was kept around for to accomplish. I've found myself wondering the same. Is it my family? Is it influence? Is it some contact I've never considered or don't even remember which God turned in to something beautiful? I've thought it might be any of these things.

And then God spoke. The voice I clearly heard inside...whatever that is...said, "This story was never about you, Brett. It was always about me." Wow. Immediately I felt ashamed that it had taken 30 years to be awakened to this. We say, "To God be the glory!!" all the time. It shouldn't take this long for me to get to this spot. It's not what I'm to do....it's what He's done. Living with the burden of this story...and in many ways it is burdensome...this is so freeing. There's no room for anything but intense, intense gratitude and praise.

On Easter Sunday, Brandon, in his brief talk after the Drama for your Mama(!), mentioned Lazarus. As a side comment he said something about the fact that Lazarus ultimately died. And it occurred to me that we don't think about that much...that Lazarus ultimately died. The story of him being saved from his death is so powerful it distracts us from the reality that this man ultimately ceased breathing. I can imagine that at Lazarus' funeral people spoke of this event that happened to him...this raising from the dead. That story was more powerful than his ultimate death. It is told even today. It speaks powerfully and clearly that Jesus is the Christ. That life wins. And it occurred to me that this story I'm a player in is just the same. It's been told. It will be told after I die. My sons will tell their children. My friends will tell others.

My mom and I spoke Sunday night. I shared this encounter with her, albeit reluctantly as she already thinks I'm a Jesus freak! She said, "That's amazing. I was in the doctor's office on Wednesday. I was talking to the nurse, and somehow we started talking about faith, and I told her your story. She started crying. She said she had already been told this story by the doctor who was present at the time of your experience, and was just excited to meet the mother who endured all this watching her son dragged to death only to be rescued."

Yeah, that story isn't about me. It's a lot bigger than that. TO HIM BE THE GLORY!!! in ways beyond what I've comprehended before.

Thanks for providing me space to share this...I've been working through all of it for the past week or so now. I hope there's some point of encouragement or resonance in there for someone.